Wednesday, November 18, 2009

This Is A True Story.

It's been a day. A week. Month. Year, really. I'm an eternal optimist and a people pleaser, so my only bursts of angst usually come out in the form of a 140 character tweet, or in front of my immediate family (sorry, guys. really.). Today has been no exception. There were no crazy screaming sessions (I just don't DO that) and no external outbursts, but there was The Bagel Incident.Yes, that is a bagel, a juice glass of three month old white wine and some Ghirardelli chocolate chips. If I didn't currently cohabitate with the parentals, I would have a proper wine glass. But they don't drink. So, I have this. Classy. And eff you economy. Like I said, it's been a day. Week. Month. Year.

So, I am in the kitchen making this delicious bagel thinking to myself, ohhh bagel... I love you. Get in my belly... Then disaster strikes. I drop the bagel. I snatch it up off the floor within milliseconds, count 12345! super fast after picking it up (I know, right?) and then see a spider crawling off from where I dropped the bagel. I yell "UHHH!", Hulk Smash the spider with my flip flop adorned foot and look at the bagel in my hand. I think, oh God. This is so gross. This bagel fell on the FLOOR. And just may have landed on a SPIDER.

Then I begin to reason... It landed right side up. I can just not eat the bottom part. Everyone knows the top is the best anyway.
But then all reason gets thown out the window. Screw It. I am eating this spider-floor bagel and washing it down with this generic, three week old wine. And I did.

I am so embarrassed.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

..............................................so, what's to freak out about? I do that everyday. LOL Ok, well not everyday. But it happens. Don't feel embarrassed. And to those that can't handle it, screw 'em... And look at it this way. If you keep your floor clean most of the time, it's not going to make any difference anyway. Grab the bagel, wipe it off, you're golden! :o) I'm probably not going to remember to check back here for your reply, so hit me back on facebook. k? ;O) ~Jesse